SALUD Y EMOCIONES

La Salud y Las Emociones

¿Qué enferma primero, el cuerpo o el alma?

El alma no puede enfermar puesto que no es una entidad física sino que es una entidad metafísica y porque es lo que hay perfecto en ti, el alma “evoluciona”, aprende. En realidad, buena parte de las enfermedades son todo lo contrario; son la resistencia del cuerpo emocional y mental al alma. Cuando nuestra personalidad se resiste al designio del alma es cuando enfermamos.

¿Hay emociones perjudiciales para la salud? ¿Cuáles son las que más nos perjudican?

Un 70% de las enfermedades del ser humano vienen del campo de conciencia emocional o mental. Las enfermedades muchas veces proceden de emociones no procesadas, no expresadas, reprimidas. El temor o miedo, que es la ausencia de amor, al igual es la oscuridad es la ausencia de luz; la gran enfermedad, el común denominador de buena parte de las enfermedades que hoy tenemos. Cuando el temor/miedo se queda congelado afecta al riñón, a las glándulas suprarrenales, a los huesos, a la energía vital, y puede convertirse en pánico que se llama carga emocional.

 ¿Nos hacemos los fuertes y descuidamos nuestra salud?
De héroes están llenos los cementerios. Te tienes que cuidar. Tienes tus límites, no vayas más allá. Tienes que reconocer cuáles son tus límites y superarlos porque si no los reconoces, vas a destruir tu cuerpo.

 ¿Cómo nos afecta la ira?

La ira es santa, es sagrada y es a la vez la carga emocional de la emoción que es el enfado;  es una emoción “positiva” porque te lleva a la autoafirmación, a la búsqueda de tu territorio, a defender lo que es tuyo, lo que es justo, a que nadie traspase tus límites . Pero cuando la ira, repito, que es la carga emocional, se vuelve irritabilidad, agresividad, resentimiento, odio, se vuelve contra ti, y afecta al hígado, la digestión, el sistema inmunológico.

¿La alegría por el contrario nos ayuda a estar sanos?

La alegría es la más bella de las emociones porque es la emoción de la inocencia, del corazón, y es la más sanadora de todas, porque no es contraria a ninguna otra. Un poquito de tristeza con alegría escribe poemas. La alegría con miedo nos lleva a contextualizar el miedo y a no darle tanta importancia.

¿La alegría suaviza el ánimo?

Sí, la alegría suaviza todas las otras emociones porque nos permite procesarlas desde la inocencia. La alegría pone al resto de las emociones en contacto con el corazón y les da un sentido ascendente. Las canaliza para que lleguen al mundo de la mente.

¿Y la tristeza?
La tristeza es una emoción, que, algunos lo llaman un sentimiento que puede llevarte a la depresión que es la carga emocional cuando te envuelves en ella y no la expresas, pero también puede ayudarte. La tristeza te lleva a contactar contigo mismo y a restaurar el control interno. Te informa como cualquiera de las emociones son simplemente nos informa de que algo se está pasando en nosotros. Atender y gestionar o canalizar las emociones es de sabio.  Todas las emociones “negativas”; de hecho las emociones no son ni positivas ni negativas, tienen su propio aspecto peculiar de informarnos, las hacemos negativas cuando las reprimimos.

¿Es mejor aceptar esas emociones que consideramos “negativas” como parte de uno mismo?

Como parte para transformarlas, es decir, cuando se aceptan fluyen, y ya no se estancan, y se pueden transmutar. Tenemos que canalizarlas para que lleguen desde el corazón hasta la cabeza. ¡Qué difícil! Sí, es muy difícil. Yo diría que no es fácil. Realmente las emociones básicas son tristeza, enfado, el amor, miedo (que es ausencia de amor), asco y sorpresa. Para te lo recuerdes mejor, te las pongo en siglas en forma de pregunta, ¿T.E. A.M.A.S.? Cada letra de esta pregunta representa una emoción; así que todo lo que existe es amor, por exceso o defecto. Constructivo o destructivo. Porque también existe el amor que se aferra, que se apega, el amor que sobreprotege por apego, se convierte en el amor tóxico, destructivo, posesivo.

¿Cómo prevenir la enfermedad? 

Somos creadores, así que yo creo que la mejor forma es creando salud. Y si creamos salud no tendremos ni que prevenir la enfermedad ni que atacarla, porque seremos salud. Lo normal es estar sano; lo no normal es estar enfermo. La enfermedad es la ausencia de la salud, como hemos comentado antes que el miedo o el enfado es la ausencia del amor como la oscuridad es la ausencia de la luz.

¿Y si aparece la enfermedad?

Pues tendremos que aceptarla porque somos humanos. También enfermó Krishnamurti de un cáncer de páncreas y no era nadie que llevara una vida desordenada. Mucha gente muy valiosa espiritualmente ha enfermado. Me acuerdo de un amigo que al verme resfriado, me preguntó, ¿Tú también…? queriendo decir que los que llevamos una vida “espiritual” no nos enfermamos. El cuerpo, al estar hecho de materia, está sujeto a enfermedades; no está inmune a la enfermedad. Debemos explicarlo para aquellos que creen que enfermar es fracasar. El fracaso y el éxito son dos maestros, pero nada más. Y cuando tú eres el aprendiz, tienes que aceptar e incorporar la lección de la enfermedad en tu vida. Cada vez más personas sufren ansiedad. La ansiedad es un sentimiento de vacío, que a veces se vuelve un hueco en el estómago, una sensación de falta de aire. Es un vacío existencial que surge cuando buscamos fuera en lugar de buscar dentro. Surge cuando buscamos en los acontecimientos externos, cuando buscamos muletas, apoyos externos, cuando no tenemos la solidez de la búsqueda interior. Si no aceptamos la soledad y no nos convertimos en nuestra propia compañía, vamos a experimentar ese vacío y vamos a intentar llenarlo con cosas y posesiones. Pero como no se puede llenar con cosas, cada vez el vacío aumenta.

¿Y qué podemos hacer para liberarnos de esa angustia? 

La angustia no se puede pasar comiendo chocolate, o con más calorías, o buscando un príncipe azul o princesa azul afuera. La angustia se pasa cuando entras en tu interior, te aceptas como eres y te reconcilias contigo mismo. La angustia viene de que no somos lo que queremos ser, pero tampoco lo que somos, entonces estamos en el "debería ser", y no somos ni lo uno ni lo otro. El estrés es otro de los males de nuestra época. El estrés viene de la competitividad, de que quiero ser perfecto, quiero ser mejor, de que quiero dar una nota que no es la mía, de que quiero imitar. Y realmente sólo se puede competir cuando decides ser tu propia competencia, es decir, cuando quieres ser único, original y auténtico, no una fotocopia de nadie. El estrés destructivo perjudica el sistema inmunológico. Pero un buen estrés es una maravilla, porque te permite estar alerta y despierto en las crisis, y poder aprovecharlas como una oportunidad para emerger a un nuevo nivel de conciencia.

¿Qué nos recomendarías para sentirnos mejor con nosotros mismos?

La soledad deseada. Estar con uno mismo cada día es maravilloso. Estar solo está bien de cuando en cuando. Estar 20 minutos con uno mismo es el comienzo de la meditación; es tender un puente hacia la verdadera salud; es acceder al altar interior o al Santuario interior, al Ser interior. En mis cursos de Inteligencia Emocional nivel I, se “construye” un Santuario interior. Mi recomendación es que la gente ponga su despertador 20 minutos antes para no robarle tiempo a sus ocupaciones. Si dedicas, no el tiempo que te sobra, sino esos primeros minutos de la mañana, cuando estás fresco y descansado, a meditar, esa pausa te va a recargar, porque en la pausa habita el potencial del alma. También otros 10 ó 20 minutos antes de acostarte para poner fin el trajín del día de trabajo. Con este descanso mental y emocional lo llevas en el sueño y te despiertas más despejado, más descansado y más relajado. Evitar actividad como ver a T.V. La mayoría de los programas de la T.V. no son aptos para el ser, y estas imágenes que vemos en la tele, se graba en el sub/inconsciente y no despertamos con esta programación.

¿Qué es para ti la felicidad? 

La felicidad es un tema “difícil” de abordar. La felicidad no se puede definir ni se puede poner en palabras ni conceptualizar. Es la esencia de la vida. Es estar no apegado a nada ni a nadie emocional, mentalmente y sentimentalmente. Los chinos dicen ‘No sabes qué es la vista si los ojos están obstruidos; no sabes qué es el sonido si el oído está obstruido; no sabes qué el gusto si la boca está obstruido.’ Y yo añadiría que no sabes qué la felicidad si tu corazón está obstruido. La felicidad es el sentido mismo de la vida, encarnamos para ser felices, no para otra cosa. Pero la felicidad no es placer ni gozo ni emoción ni tan siquiera conseguir lo que uno quiere. La felicidad es integridad. Cuando todos los sentidos se consagran al ser, podemos ser felices. Somos felices cuando creemos en nosotros, cuando confiamos en nosotros, cuando nos encomendamos a nivel transpersonal a un nivel que trasciende el pequeño yo o el pequeño ego. Somos felices si no estamos apegados a nada ni a nadie a nivel mental y emocional. Somos felices cuando tenemos un sentido que va más allá de la vida cotidiana, de lo material (cosas y personas) cuando no aplazamos la vida, cuando no nos desplazamos a nosotros mismos, cuando fluimos, cuando estamos en paz y a salvo con la vida y con nuestra conciencia.

Vivir el Presente

 ¿Es importante vivir en el presente? ¿Cómo lograrlo?

Dejamos ir el pasado y no hipotecamos la vida a las expectativas de futuro cuando nos volcamos en el ser y no en el tener. Yo me digo que la felicidad tiene que ver con la realización, y ésta con la capacidad de habitar la realidad. Y vivir en realidad es salir del mundo de la confusión.
 
¿Tan confundidos estamos, en su opinión?
Tenemos tres ilusiones enormes que nos confunden. Primero creemos que somos un cuerpo sólo y no un alma, cuando el cuerpo es el instrumento o el vehículo de la vida y se acaba con la muerte física. Segundo, creemos que el sentido de la vida es el placer, gozo, emoción, deseo y conseguir aquello que queremos; pero a más placer no hay más felicidad, sino más dependencia. No es feliz aquel que más tiene, sino aquel que tiene menos no tiene deseos. Placer y  felicidad no es lo mismo. Hay que consagrar el placer a la vida y no la vida al placer. La tercera ilusión es el poder físico; creemos tener el poder infinito de vivir.

¿Y qué necesitamos realmente para vivir?, ¿acaso el amor?

El amor, tan traído y tan llevado, y tan calumniado, es una fuerza renovadora. El amor es magnífico porque crea cohesión. En el amor todo está vivo, como un río que se renueva a sí mismo. En el amor siempre uno puede renovarse, porque todo lo ordena. En el amor no hay usurpación, no hay propiedad, no hay desplazamiento, no hay miedo, no hay resentimiento, no hay apego porque cuando tú te ordenas porque vives el amor, cada cosa ocupa su lugar, y entonces se restaura la armonía. Se confunde mucho el amor con atracción física, mental, emocional y sentimental. Cuando uno está atraído a cualquiera de esta atracción, no puede amar. Ahora, desde la perspectiva humana, lo asimilamos con la debilidad, pero el amor no es débil. Nos debilita cuando entendemos que alguien a quien queremos no nos quieren. Amar se confunde también con querer. En el amar no hay deseo. Querer, sí que hay todo tipo de deseo. Hay una gran confusión en nuestra cultura. Creemos que sufrimos por amor, que nuestras catástrofes son por amor. Pero no es por amor, es por enamoramiento, es por el deseo de… que es una variedad del apego. Eso que llamamos habitualmente amor es una droga. Igual que se depende de la cocaína, la marihuana o la morfina, también se depende del enamoramiento y/o el deseo. Es una muleta para apoyarse, en vez de llevar a alguien en mi corazón para liberarle y liberarme. El verdadero amor tiene una esencia fundamental que es la libertad, y siempre conduce a la libertad. Pero a veces nos sentimos atados, amarrados, sujetos a un “amor”. Si el amor conduce a la dependencia es eros. Eros es un fósforo, y cuando lo enciendes se te consume rápidamente, en dos minutos ya te quemas el dedo. Hay muchos amores que son así, pura chispa: amor fraternal, maternal, paternal, filial y todos los “…al/nal” que hay. Aunque esa chispa puede servir para encender el leña del verdadero amor. Cuando el leña está encendido produce el fuego. Ese es el amor impersonal, que produce luz y calor.

¿Puedes darnos algún consejo/sugerencia para alcanzar el amor verdadero?

Solamente la verdad. Confía en la verdad; no tienes que ser como la princesa o el príncipe de los sueños del otro, no tienes que ser ni más ni menos de lo que eres. No eres OK ni tampoco no eres no OK. Tú eres Tú. Tienes un derecho sagrado, que es el derecho a equivocarte; tienes otro, que es el derecho a perdonar, porque el error es tu maestro. Ámate, sincérate y considérate. Valórate y acéptate. Si tú no te quieres, es decir, si tú no te amas, no vas a encontrar a nadie que te pueda amar. El amor produce amor. ‘Love begets love’ como decimos en inglés. Si te amas, vas a encontrar el amor. Si no, vacío. Pero nunca busques una migaja; eso es indigno de ti. No mendigues por amor; da amor. La clave entonces es amarse a sí mismo. Y al prójimo como a ti mismo. Esto lo dijo Jesús, el Cristo. Si no te amas a ti, no amas a Dios, ni a tu hijo, ni a nadie porque te estás apegando, te estás aferrando, estás condicionando, y a hasta cierto punto, controlando al otro. Jesucristo dijo: “Si tú no odias a tu padre, madre, hermano, no puedes ser mi discípulo.” Cuando Jesús dijo “odiar” se refería a “desapegar”. Acéptate como eres; lo que no aceptamos no lo podemos transformar, y la vida es una corriente de transformación permanente.
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Ross Galán, NLP Spiritual Life Coach

Have YOU Found Your Way in the Road

In a world of accelerating change it’s no surprise there is also an increase in the number of people feeling stressed. It goes some way to explain the parallel increase in the number of tools, techniques, books, courses and teachers all focused at helping us to manage and prevent the stresses and strains of modern life.

One increasingly visible offering centres around the idea of creating a more spiritually based life and lifestyle. However, many have an immediate resistance to such an idea, usually because they don’t really understand precisely what it means.

When some hear the word ‘spiritual’ they immediately associate it with some kind of religious commitment or practice, which is often not a place they want to go. They have not yet fathomed the difference between spirituality and religion. Conversely, when others hear the word ‘religion’ it conjures ideas about that mysterious energy of ‘the spirit’ and that’s either just too ‘other worldly’ or completely irrelevant to their life. Could that be because haven’t yet seen the difference between religion and spirituality? Then there are those who believe spirituality is just another passing fad of the ‘new age’. While others consider any kind of spiritual or religious exploration is best left until their old age!

In this, the age of abundant information, the theories and beliefs of almost every spiritual path and religious tradition are now available at the touch of a keyboard. On the one hand this accessibility, known by no other generation, is a huge advantage. And yet it is also easy to thoroughly confuse oneself by ‘supermarket shopping’ the world wide web (www) for just about every religious and spiritual concept under the sun. So what exactly is the difference between the two? How are we to tease them apart so that we may see clearly and decide what is best for us? Here are a few possible pointers.

Religion, in an organised sense, tends to encourage the individual to attach to and identify with a packaged set of externally prescribed beliefs and rituals. From a spiritual point of view this is the foundation of an ‘egoic’ state of consciousness and therefore not such a good idea. Spirituality, on the other hand, tends to encourage a certain detachment from all beliefs and the use of some meditative and reflective practice to realise, reveal and ‘see’ what is true for oneself. Religion tends to see this as too much freedom and the licence to do anything in the name of spirituality, much of which is considered to be neither religious nor spiritual! The consequence is often many people running around doing many things in the ‘name of spirituality’ without realising it’s not!

One of the original meanings of religion is to ‘reconnect’, to ‘bind’ together. Religion however, can tend to connect people to just another institution and the ideas and beliefs found therein. Whereas spirituality tends to help the individual restore their awareness of their authentic self as opposed to their ‘learned’ sense of self, in order to reconnect with their true nature which is peaceful and loving.

Peace is My Religion

The spiritual practitioner would likely say that when one is ‘being spiritual’ one's true religion is peace itself, not as an idealised mental concept, but as a realised state of being. And yet many who do walk a spiritual path will say that peace is not possible until all attachments are dropped, most especially attachment to beliefs and belief systems, which tend to be the currency of what we call religion! This often seems to be why there is often the absence of peace both within religions and between religions. Religion on the other hand tends to emphasise that there needs to be a foundation of ‘right beliefs’ in daily life in order to ensure decisions and actions are ‘righteous‘ and therefore aligned with what is right, so that we may do the right thing for our self and for others.

The difference between religion and spirituality is obviously not black and white. It seems useful however, to understand both the differences and the similarities if we are to create an authentic path for our self through this journey we call ‘life’, regardless of whether we may call that path religious or spiritual. As we do, we will likely notice shades of grey, overlapping ideas and areas of utter contrast.

This short ‘exploration’ is essentially a ‘contrast of tendencies’. ‘Tendency’ here means ‘frequently’ but not in every case. For example, religion tends to be male dominated and spirituality tends to be a more feminine domain. This may simply be because religion tends towards ‘imposing’ and ‘forcing’, whereas spirituality tends towards ‘allowing’ and ‘nurturing’. But in neither case is it absolute. While many religious approaches tend to make either the male or female superior, an authentic spirituality would probably transcend the issue of gender altogether. Each of us obviously makes up our mind about the efficacy of each approach. And yet neither of these approaches is the ‘opposite’ of the other, as it sometimes appears in language. Sometimes the spiritual individual is more religious in their sense of ‘personal connection’ to ‘the source’ or what they may call ‘the divine’. Whereas sometimes the religious individual is obviously more spiritual in their ability to bring their inherent goodness, their virtue, through into their daily actions and interactions.

So as we contrast and compare, it’s not that one is better than the other though it may seem that one may, at times, be deeper than the other.

 

Open and Closed

Religion tends towards a closed and structured organisation whereas spirituality tends to emerge organically as a more open and free flowing community. In a religious organisation there can be the danger that the individual becomes institutionalised which essentially means dependent upon the organisation for comfort, support and, at the deepest level, their self identity. The spiritual approach tends to encourage a greater sense of non-dependence and a sense of identity that is not invested in anything outside oneself. Perhaps the sign of a healthy religious/spiritual organisation/community is that when people come they are allowed to take support and what may be a new sense of identity, but as they learn and ‘unlearn’ they are encouraged to grow out of their need for that support and to rediscover their true identity for themselves. All at the pace that suits the individual.

Religion tends to emphasise the need for hierarchy and position, sometimes unaware that the traps therein can sabotage the spiritual growth of those who come to occupy those ‘apparent’ positions. Spirituality tends to encourage a vision of equality ‘even when’ some are obviously a little further along the path in the awakening of their self awareness, perhaps a little deeper in their wisdom and perhaps a little more powerful in their capacity to deal with life around them.

We would tend to ‘join’ a religion, declaring to others our alignment with a fixed set of beliefs as the mark of our ‘membership’. Whereas the spiritual individual tends to steer clear of joining anything seeing it as a limitation or block to their inner spiritual growth and the restoration of their spiritual power.

Perhaps this is why religion tends to create a culture where people ‘expect’ to be externally guided, where there is one authority or perhaps several senior authorities. This can be another encouragement towards dependency and perhaps a sense of being controlled and possibly misled. This sometimes ‘triggers’ some people’s resistance towards anything that smacks of institutionalised religion. Spirituality on the other hand, tends towards the liberation of the individual from all external authority and the gradual re-emergence of self-mastery so that one's authority arises from within as a personal realisation of what is true. Religion tends to indicate that this is in itself a trap that leads to many mistakes, all of which can be avoided if the words, beliefs and commandments of ‘others’ are obediently followed. Spirituality tends to encourage this self-awakening indicating that if the individual is ‘earnest’ then they will recognise any mistakes and learn from them naturally. Religion sometimes says this is the road to ...not a very nice place!

By virtue of the cultivation of a ‘religious identity’, religion tends towards an exclusive outlook on life, an exclusive relationship to others, and a sense of exclusivity that tends to ‘separate’ from others. Whereas spirituality tends towards an inclusive perspective, an equalising and an ‘all are one’ vision that unifies as opposed to separates.

Outside IN or Inside OUT

And while a ‘religious member’ tends to deny the validity of the beliefs and ways of other religions, the spiritual aspirant tends to accept and respect everyone’s ways and beliefs regardless of whether they agree with them or not. Here is one of many areas where religion and spirituality do come together as many ‘religious people’ do tend to accept and respect the beliefs of others, even though they may not agree.

And so it is that an individuals ‘religious life’ can tend to be lived from ‘outside in’, tending towards ritual, costume, custom and tradition. Whereas, by and large, the spiritual practitioner tends to live from ‘inside out’ as they seek to strip away their attachment to any old habits and all traditions so that they may restore a truer awareness of the self as the naked and free being within.

It is perhaps in such an inwardly naked state that the spiritual practitioner tends to believe (and seek to practise) that the mind can only be truly at peace, the intellect can only see with true clarity and the heart can only embrace ‘the other’ with the truest love. Perhaps that is the point at which spirituality becomes truly religious in its capacity to ‘openly and transparently connect’ with all life at all levels, including a direct personal connection to what is sometimes referred to as ‘the divine’. Who knows...exactly? Words seem inadequate!

Perhaps we can only know personally when we are ready to explore for our self, fearlessly and courageous, humbly and earnestly, that fork in the road that seems to split and offer a choice of religion or spirituality. And perhaps we may discover there was no fork in reality, no split in actuality, simply us walking and waking, walking and waking, walking and waking!

What I would like to ask you is this: What does spirituality mean to you?

Have you ever thought of what it means to be religious?

The “task” you need to do is to ask five people this week the above two questions and research the insights and opinions of others around you.

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Ross Galan, NLP Spiritual Life Coach

We Are Just Passing Through

There is something to be said for ‘guest consciousness’.

Have you ever noticed one of the delights of going on holiday is the temporariness of everything?  Wherever you go you are and wherever you are right now, you are a guest even if you did buy the place where you are. You are just passing through. Your relationship with everyone and everything is temporary. With this in mind, you are more relaxed and easy.  Nothing is precious. Nothing and no one is possessed or owned.  Nothing needs to be guarded.  Nothing around us is used as a measure of our self worth.  Everyone you meet: (including your children, your spouse, parents and friends) is just passing through your life so that while you thoroughly enjoy their company, sharing and all and loving them, you don’t try to hang on to them, cling on to them, even in your head, when its time to go. You move smoothly from one scene to another, releasing the last scene quickly and easily, thus remaining free and light.  Such is the consciousness of being a guest.

Could it be possible to bring that same consciousness, that same lightness and freedom to our life as a whole?  Is there value in seeing our self simply as a guest in this world?  If so would it be possible to adopt such a mindset on a daily basis?

It does seem possible if only because of the impermanence of everything (life) around us.  Everything and everyone comes and goes, appears and disappears…eventually.  Some of the ‘side effects’ or benefits of ‘guest consciousness’ might include the following:

Passing Through

When we are playing the role of ‘guest’ in the world we are aware that whatever comes to us in the form of situations and circumstances are just passing scenes in which we can choose to participate in or not.  Just as the scenery on a coach trip is ever changing, so do the scenes of life.  While ‘guest consciousness’ can help us to flow easily with and through life, the consciousness of the ‘permanent resident’ tends to want to freeze certain scenes and try to control how those scenes will play out.

Nothing is Mine

As a guest we know that nothing is ‘mine’ but we do get the temporary use of ‘some’ of whatever is around us.  The guest never says, ‘that’s mine’.  The freedom that comes with the absence of possessiveness allows us to live lightly.  Whereas the permanent resident tends to covet and take some form of subtle support from what they believe they possess thereby creating the mental tension of grasping.

Take Things and People as We Find Them

As a guest we find it easier to accept people and situations as we encounter them.  It is easier to come ‘fresh’ to our relationships leaving behind memories of encounters yesterday.  The permanent resident however tends to want to maintain relationships in one particular mode believing that will give them stability.  So they tend to try to hold other people in their perception ‘one dimensionally’, usually based on the earliest encounters.  They thereby easily lose the ‘fluidity’ of their relationships.

Temporary Residence

As a guest we are fully aware that we only ever live as a temporary resident in a temporary location.  Moving on is recognised as inevitable so there is no shock to the system when it’s time to go.    The guest is always ready to pack whatever they need and move onto the next location and into the next scene. The permanent resident is more likely to be frequently anxious about ‘what may’ happen, ‘what if’ they have to move on, ‘when will’ they be able to find the comfort of permanence in an every changing and impermanent world!

Creative Challenge

As a guest there is a continuous challenge to use ones creative capacity to make the best of wherever we are and whatever is in our lives. This generates some of the deeper satisfactions in life as life itself is designed to be a creative exercise.  The consciousness of the permanent resident however, easily forgets their creative potential and tends to use their energy protectively, as opposed to creatively, thereby unknowlingly suppressing an intrinsic joy.

Change Ready

As a guest we are accustomed to and ready to meet and respond proactively to unpredictable change.  So when large or small changes do come we are neither surprised or shocked.  We are not ‘phased’.  The permanent resident, on the other hand, is always feeling somewhat insecure as they have no way of knowing or controlling whatever change happens in the world around them.  They are the worriers. They are much less ready, willing and able to respond effectively to an ever changing world.

Travel Light

As a guest we can only carry so much with us materially and mentally.  Compared to the permanent resident we travel lightly and therefore step forward with a lightness of spirit.  We pack the ‘case of life’ only with the essentials.  Whereas the permanent resident has the tendency to define their life by how much they can get in all their trunks!  So they tend to travel through life with a heaviness that can be energy draining. 

Attitude of Gratitude

As a guest we are grateful for all the large and small things that come our way each day. All are gifts.  Good fortune is accepted as a blessing from a benevolent universe despite the gloominess of others.  Not such good fortune is taken as a message that something on the journey may be briefly out of synch. Yet we are grateful for the signal and easily adjust.  Both forms of fortune are embraced as part of life’s rich and varied pageant.  The permanent resident however finds it harder to expand their capacity to be grateful since they tend to be more on the lookout and ready to defend against whatever misfortunes may shake their sense of permanence.

It’s not that the guest has abdicated their responsibilities and ‘free float’ their way through daily life.  It’s just that ‘guest consciousness’ doesn’t take the changing scenes and circumstances of life quite so seriously and therefore quite so fearfully.  They are much more able to surf the waves of life, steer a creative course through life and meet their responsibilities in life, with a lighter touch, a more joyous touch.  And while the authorities have us all down as permanent residents of some country or county, some shire or town, it doesn’t stop us from adopting the consciousness of the guest as we negotiate and play the scenes of daily life, ever ready to let go and move on, not to the next country or next town, but just to the next scene.

The guest is like water while the permanent resident is like the rock.  One is almost always flowing, occasional gurgling and yet sometimes completely still.  It nourishes everything that it touches.  Whereas the rock is almost immovable and refuses to let anything in.

* How would you generally describe your approach to life?

 * Why do you think we can easily loose our fluidity and get stuck?

* In what areas of your life and in what ways could you experiment with ‘guest consciousness’? 

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Ross Galan, NLP Spiritual Life Coach

Detached Observation

Detachment does not mean we don’t care about what is going on in the world, or that we avoid what is coming to us from the world.  Detachment does not mean coldness or hardness.  It just means we learn to stand back and observe for a moment where before we would have allowed ourselves to be instantly sucked in to the dramas of others.  Detachment gives us that ‘space of time’ to create a measured response and not be overruled by a habitual reaction.  It allows us to check our perception of what is coming to us and what is happening around us.  And that can be as simple as seeing a situation as a problem or as an opportunity.  Or it can be as deep as a shift from seeing the world as a dark and dangerous place to the world as an adventure playground.  That one inner shift alone allows us to stop taking things so seriously and start being more creative and playful.  The art of detachment also allows us to move from actor to audience and back again – one moment just observing and getting a sense of things, and the next moment fully engaging. 

This inner observational ability, sometimes known as ‘detached involvement’, means the world ceases to crowd our mind and randomly shape our thoughts and feelings.  In learning to take time to just be watchful prior to the creation of our decisions and actions we can see with a deeper awareness, think with greater concentration and make our decisions with greater clarity.  By standing back internally and learning to watch life’s flow we naturally become less influenced by all those forces over which we have no control.  And in so doing there is weakening of the feeling that we are at the mercy of events, and an increasing sense that we have greater control over our own destiny.

Filtering Wisely
In the age of information overload it becomes essential to filter out what is of value and what is not.  We find it hard to remember what was in the newspaper or on TV two days ago simply because it had no value to us.  Discerning what has value, which usually turns out to be very little, helps us not to waste time and energy.  So much of the information that catches our attention ‘out there’ is simply stories of others lives, a form of local or global gossip, which we don’t need to know. By filtering out only that which is truly of value to us and not consuming or being consumed by it, we help our self to remain mentally fresh, emotionally stable and use our time and energy in the most worthwhile way.  Life is neither short nor long, but it is a span of experience in which we get an opportunity to create something that is both valuable for others and fulfilling for ourselves.  If we spend that time consuming the creativity of others we will miss the opportunity to know and use the full potential of our own creativity.  And there is always a good chance we just might end up with a bad dose of ‘information indigestion’.

Recovering Stability
We may have realised that all our stress in life is self-created.  We may have realised that our stressful thoughts and feelings are of our own making as we respond to people and events.  We may have therefore decided to take full responsibility for our ‘ability to respond’.  But still certain people and situations are able to ‘press our buttons’ and we react emotionally, pushing our self off balance again.  At this point many give up the process of empowering themselves by restoring self-responsibility (response-ability), and they revert to old patterns in which they allow the pain that stress is, to habitually recur.  But if we can practise recovering our stability we might eventually find our self stress-free in what were previously stress-triggering situations.

This means that when we do react negatively and ‘lose the plot’ we then take time to sit quietly and centre ourselves.  Where there is stress, where there is any form of ‘reactivity’, it means we are not in control, our emotions are controlling us.  There is some form of emotional disturbance, which can be likened to a storm within our consciousness.  But if we can learn to return to the centre of our consciousness, to the ‘eye of the storm’, we will always find our peace and our power. Today that may take 10 minutes, tomorrow 8 minutes, the next day 5 minutes, and so on until one day no minutes.  It is this kind of sustained inner work that we all get the chance to practice every day.  Even the greatest saints and the so called enlightened masters would have practised this vital aspect of self management in the face of the everyday changing textures and colours of the many varied scenes and personalities of life’s rich pageant.

The question you should be asking is on which relationships/situations do you think you would benefit from applying the above inner skills?

You might want to reflect on how you see yourself responding i.e. thinking and acting differently, if you practiced each of the above.

Take an action to dedicate at least two days to each of the above self-management skills this week and consciously apply in practical situations.
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Ross Galan, NLP Spiritual lIfe Coach

A Thin Line Between Failure & Success

Most of the time, the difference between what makes something or someone a success instead of a failure is extremely narrow. You can walk a fine line between sheer success and utter failure. The thing is, the longer you walk that line, the larger the gap becomes. Let me give you a simple definition for both failure and success that you can easily use to assess what you are doing in your own life and help you get on the side of the line where you can get the most out of your existence.

What is failure?

Failure isn’t one occurrence. That would be an error. Failure is the accumulation of errors over a continuous period of time. For example, if you don’t clean your home one day, that’s not a failure. It might be an error. However, if you don’t clean your home 30 days in a row and your home is a big mess, then it’s no longer an error, but a failure. Usually, this is what causes people to experience failure whether it’s in their personal life or professional one. They repeat the same error day in and day out, and the sum of the errors just pile on until it’s a complete failure. You could eat junk food one day, but if you eat it every single day, then you suffer the consequences of such continuous errors with poor health and poor body image. What about if you put off doing a task for one day? What if you put it off every single day? I see this all too often in my line of work, where the accumulation of errors builds into failure, which then builds into disaster! Think about certain bad decisions or choices that you have been making in your life lately. Make the promise to yourself right now not to repeat this every day. One trait that I have noticed with high achievers, is that they are able to correct an error extremely quickly. If you want a chance to succeed, you need to learn from your errors and correct them FAST. The quicker you learn from your errors and avoid repeating them, the better you can avoid any failure, and the faster you can achieve success.

What is success?

On the opposite side of the spectrum, success is the accumulation of good decisions made continuously over a period of time. For example, if you work out one day, you won’t see any result or success. But if you work out every day for 5 months, you will see noticeable and measurable results, and that is real, tangible success. If you write one page a day for a year, you have a book. If you eat good healthy food every single day of your life, you will have a healthier body. Success is quite simply managing to accomplish good disciplines on a daily basis. The reason why the majority of people do not achieve a high level of success is the lack of consistency. They will eat well 3-4 days out of 7, and work out 1 or 2 days per week. They will complete their tasks 3 times out of 10. Mediocre consistency creates mediocre results. If you want to experience life on a whole other level of personal success, you need to be the most consistent person possible.

As you can see, the line between success and failure is very thin. Sometimes it’s not obvious that we are doing something that is wrong, so it’s crucial to have an open mind and be critical of oneself. But it’s the act of doing things a certain way over a period of time that widens the gap between success and failure so tremendously. The key here is to spot your errors early, learn from them, and fix them. Then, whatever you are doing that works, keep doing it every single day by developing the habit of consistency. This is an absolute sure-fire way to obtain massive amounts of success.

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Ross Galan, NLP Spiritual Life Coach

Ways to Wake Up Motivated!

If you have trouble waking up in the morning with motivation, you are not alone. From the research that I do and the number of people I speak with, this is a very common occurrence. I myself dealt with this issue which lingered on for years. I would go to bed guaranteeing to myself that I would wake up with all the motivation in the world, ready to tackle anything in front of me, only to have all of it completely forgotten in the morning. It’s quite frustrating, to say the least! There are simple things that you can do that will help ensure that you wake up with the proper level of motivation to get you to have a productive, successful day. Here is my personal list of things that do just that:

Get out of bed immediately

Arguably, the worst thing you can do to your motivation in the morning is to stay lying in your comfortable bed. You will try to debate with yourself, whether you should get up or stay a little longer. Guess which side usually wins? How do you get yourself out of bed immediately? My trick was to put my annoying alarm clock in another room. I had no choice but to get up and look for it to turn it off. So I was immediately out of bed. I hear now they make alarms that bounce around so that you have to get up to catch it…I think that’s pretty clever too! Getting out of bed asap is the #1 priority if you want to wake up motivated. It’s the foundation, without that, everything else fails.

Drink a large glass of water

Once you are out of bed, you should drink water as soon as possible. You body becomes quite dehydrated during sleep, and this lack of water in your system causes you to feel fatigue when you wake up. Drink some water, and guaranteed you will feel better and immediately more lucid and motivated. I always keep a full glass of water in my room before bedtime, so once I am done running around to shut my alarm off, my glass of water is ready for me.

Stretching
I remember many years ago, I had a personal trainer that told me that if you stretch for 5-10 min. every morning, guaranteed you will have a much better day. For some reason, this always stuck with me, and I truly believe that it does wonder for motivation in the morning. When I say stretching, I don’t mean the quick stretch you do when you get out of bed. I mean, do full stretches of your arms, legs, neck, everything. Stretching increases circulation of the blood to various parts of your body, which is very important in the morning, since your system was inert for many hours. This increase in circulation increases energy levels, and energy is crucial to motivation. This 5-10 minutes of stretching in the morning can really make a difference as to what type of day you will have.

Glance at your goals

As I mentioned above, one of my biggest problems in the morning was the fact that I had forgotten all the motivation and all the things I was pumped up to do with my day once I got up. It was as if I had a case of amnesia and that within the span of sleep, everything that I was so excited about had disappeared. My way to resolving this issue was to keep a list of my goals next to my bed. I have my goals for the day, as well as my long term goals. This helps remind me what I have to get done and why it’s important to get it done. A visualization board can also be very useful. This is where you create a montage of all the things you want in your life on some type of board that you keep around your home. Looking at this right away in the morning is a wonderful method to get the right amount of motivation that you need to jumpstart your day.

Psyche yourself up

Many years ago I worked in sales and within two months I had become the #1 salesperson in the company. Although I was a newbie, I was more motivated than anyone and it paid off big time. One of my tricks was that I had the ability to psyche myself up so much as I was getting ready in the morning, that by the time I had arrived for work, I was on fire. I couldn’t be stopped. Instead of saying to yourself how it would be better if you could just go back to bed or that you just don’t feel like doing anything, learn the habit of having constructive self talk. Build yourself up. If you need a boost, use self-help tapes. Those are always great to listen to and the morning is ideal to get that motivation going. You can put it on as you get ready, even listen to it as you stretch for example.

Music
Listening to your favourite music in the morning can help put you in a good mood, which will then increase your energy and your motivation. I know I find it very boring in the morning if it’s all quiet. Feeling bored makes you want to go back to sleep! Music helps tremendously in creating an atmosphere that is more fun and more upbeat, which is required to get that motivation in the morning. You can set your alarm to play your favourite song, there are programs that easily do so available on the web, and the easiest way is probably to use your cell phone to play your favourite tune as your alarm ring tone. If you want some fun songs that can really help motivate you in the morning.

Remember that one Desires

What is that one thing that you want in your life? What is it that you absolutely desire? Waking up with that one thought in your mind can provide you with the motivation to move mountains! We all have that one “want” that is the driving force behind everything that we do. Having this in your mind first thing in the morning can make the difference between a lackluster day and a day where you completed everything that you set out to do. This desire should never leave you. It should be with you at all times, and particularly as you get out of bed. This desire should be so grand and so spectacular that it overrides every negative or non-productive thought that may cross your mind in the morning. Think about your one desire and make it the first thought that pops into your head as you open your eyes in the morning, and watch your motivation skyrocket.

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Ross Galan, NLP Spiritual Life Coach